I Am Not Your First
by CEA
Summary: Minerva McGonagall is Albus's star student, but she's much more then just a student to him. No one ever knew of their affair. Here is a short piece describing just that. Please RR.


NOTE: This deals with a student-teacher relationship. If that a offends you, then don't read this. Simple as that. I don't appreciate flames. This is a songfic to Tatu's _Ya Tvoya Ne Pervaya_, which translates into I Am Not Your First (thus the title of the fanfic). It's an excellent song, just to let you know.

***********

I Am Not Your First

By CEA

***********

Hello... 

Hello... 

Do you see wind? 

So what? 

Just look out the window. 

So what? 

It was sunny yesterday. 

So what? 

Why do you always say the same thing?

I am the answering machine. 

Minerva walked slowly down the halls to her classroom, blue eyes blinding her vision. It wasn't right, and she knew it. It hurt, these feelings. Every time she looked at him, or smiled at him, she dreamed of him.

Every time he looked at her, or smiled at her, she dreamed of him.

It culminated that day, in the classroom, long after curfew. When she'd arrived there, crying. Lord knows what had been on her mind, but he'd held her, and she'd kissed him. He'd kissed her back. It had been bliss until he'd pushed her away, and they both knew a mistake when it was made.

It wasn't right, and it didn't count.

But she could still feel his hands on her body, and she could still feel his eyes molding into her flesh.

__

Just to calm down, 

Silence is golden. 

Radio insomnia, 

The farewell station. 

Who will get who, 

By the tossing of the coins? 

Who will be left to whom, 

With nerves, pills? 

And now she still wanted him, even after committing the first act of the crime. She wanted to feel his lips on her flesh, she wanted to be with him. It was torturing her slowly, depressing her. It was pure misery. Her grades were dropping. Her heart was breaking.

She needed him more then anything.

What could she do? He'd looked at her, breathing heavily, frightened. So very frightened. "You are a child, Minerva," he'd whispered, his auburn hair astray. "You're only 17. We can't do this. _I _can't do this."

And the foolish child she _had _been, nodding and running away.

__

Behind the windows at night 

She will yell and break, she is not calm.

"This doesn't count, This doesn't count." 

She is faithful, not faithful, 

She is quiet, sad. 

"I am not your first, 

You are my sudden." 

What she didn't know, though, was that he needed her as badly as she needed him.

He couldn't concentrate. All he could think about was the girl who'd all but thrown herself at him. She wasn't any normal girl. She was Minerva McGonagall, the raven-haired beauty any man would give his life to be with once. They all desired her. He knew it. He'd heard them talking about her in the hallway, he'd seen them undressing her with their eyes. She was oblivious to her perfection, which only made them want her more.

But she'd wanted him. She'd stood there, staring at him, innocent yet older then anyone he'd ever seen..

She's a student, Albus, you old fool, he reminded himself. A student. You can't do this.

But as the days went by, that old excuse began to seem less and less reliable then it had before.

__

Show, show, show, show, show, show me love. 

Show, show, show, show, why, why I am with you. 

Show, show, show, show, show, show me love. 

Show, show, show, show, why, why I am with you. 

There she was again, standing at the door, crying. But this time, when he met her eyes, he knew that this was different. He'd caused those tears. There was only one way to get rid of them.

Tentatively, he reached up and wiped them off of her face. Her eyes were burning with determination, and he knew then he'd never be able to refuse her. She was too much for him. Oh Minerva, he thought desperately, truly nervous for the last time, why do you have to tempt me so?

And then she kissed him, and the last of his restraint was gone as he hungrily kissed her back. To Hell with the rules, and to Hell with everybody else. He needed this; she needed this. It was a kiss of life.

__

I guess someone will refuse, 

Easier not to introduce ourselves to each other.

Who of us will refuse, 

Just to calm down. 

Girls like girls, 

And then... lunatics. 

Numbers and narrows, 

Chocolate bars, wrappings. 

The thing that had frightened him the most was that she was a virgin, but she wasn't afraid. It was so like her, not to be afraid. She simply wrapped her arms around his neck and nodded, and his last coherent thought was a brief wonder if he would feel guilty about taking something so precious from her later.

Afterwards, when he was looking into her eyes, he whispered the thought that had been running through his head for the last week. "What am I going to do with you, Minerva?" he pleaded, and she only gave him a small smile and kissed him again.

__

She will yell and break, she is not calm.

"This doesn't count, This doesn't count." 

She is faithful, not faithful, 

She is quiet, sad. 

"I am not your first, 

You are my sudden." 

It was one of the most scandalous affairs that ever took place, they realized many years later. The Head Girl and Deputy Headmaster, who would later rid the world of Grindelwald and become colleagues at that same school. If ever found out, both of them would be ruined. But at the time, neither of them had cared. It had been them, together, in love, and nothing could have taken that away from them.

And no one did ever find out. Somehow, they kept their midnight rendezvous secret, and no one ever suspected a thing. They continued to meet as often as possible.

After that first time, so heated and passionate and quick, things cooled down. Sometimes they would succumb to the more basic natures of human courtship, but other times she'd simply sit with him and talk, or they'd simply sit there, not speaking, just holding one another. It was romantic and beautiful, and so precious to both of them, those times together. 

But it could never last forever. She was 17 and in her seventh year. In a month, she would be leaving.

__

Show, show, show, show, show, show me love. 

Show, show, show, show, why, why I am with you. 

Show, show, show, show, show, show me love. 

Show, show, show, show, why, why I am with you. 

And leave she did, with a last kiss and a quiet talk about the future.

"You have to go, Minerva. I want you to have a normal life. Go to college, study Transfiguration like you've always wanted to. See the world. I'll always be here, waiting, if you ever want to come back. And if you don't, I will understand," he promised, kissing her forehead tenderly.

"I will go," she promised, knowing he needed to hear this. "I'll study, I'll see the world. But I won't find anyone like you, Albus. I promise you I will come back."

He shook his head. "Don't promise me anything."

But she didn't take it back, and with one last kiss, she turned around and walked away. "Goodbye, Professor Dumbledore."

And when the door shut, he sat down in his chair and cried for the first time in many years. "Goodbye, Miss McGonagall."

__

Show me love

Show me love

Show, Show,

Show me love

Show me love

Show me love

Show, Show,

Show me love

They met up once again, in 1945, for the final battle. Before she was able to search him out at the end, though, he'd left, still unable to take her back and feel like he was inhibiting her future. Hurt and confused, she left again, and they did not see each other for the next 11 years.

No one saw the look on his face when he looked at the resumes in 1956, the year Armando Dippit finally passed from the world of the living. But if they had, they could have seen the look of joy when he came across hers, at the very bottom of the pile.

He was waiting at the foot of the stairs when she arrived, unsure how to tell her that though it had been over a decade, he still loved her just as much as he had then.

He didn't need to tell her, though. Her smile said enough that she knew what he was thinking. And with a happy laugh, she ran into his arms, and he held her tightly, knowing he could never let her go again.

She hasn't left his side since.

__

Hello... 

Hello... 

Do you see wind? 

*********

Eh. I've been wanting to write something like this for a while. Be prepared for the full, chapters-long version once I've finished LMLD or Memories. And _speaking_ of Like Mother Like Daughter, I feel really bad because I've only gotten 2 reviews on my latest chapter. If you could pelase read and review it, I would be so grateful.

Love,

~*CEA


End file.
